Down and then back up...

So Richard failed the Navy Interview! There was a few little tears (from me) just a bit of a shock I think, but in actual fact we're doing good. We have worked towards this for almost a year now and in many ways everything has come crashing down, but we always said we wanted to stay in God's will and be where he wanted us to be doing the job he wanted us to do.

God has been faithful though everything that has happened and I truly believe that he has a plan for our lives and as we keep seeking him the path will be revealed!

I have to be honest I was very worried about Richard! I thought he would come home frustrated and angry and would be on a real downer. In stead he walked in with a huge smile on his face, with presents for myself and the girls and a plan to turn over a new leaf and sort some things out! I was completly blown away and so grateful. I had be praying that God would be close to him and guild him and that he would be able to put his trust in him and he has been faithful. Rich has come back so different.. The anger has gone and the worry has gone.

They have asked him to try again next year for the Navy again, so I think that is the plan so far, but getting a good job/ second choice career sorted too. Richard is planning to take some time to find who he is again and build himself up, after this depression. To work on his self esteem and start to believe the truth, that is a good guy, a great father and husband and that he is very loved. He has really taken some knocks and I think this could be really good for him. Hopefully we can get out lives back on track and next year we will be much stronger, more useful people.  I think there are some exciting times ahead. I choose to be hopeful and to get excited.

Watch this space...

It's a Wonderful Life..

Had the most wonderful day today! Charlotte woke up at some crazy hour, but she sneaked into my bed with her freezing cold toes and we talked about all kinds of things and had a little cuddle, then decided to get up and turn the heating on as it was only 11 degrees in my room!!!

We got loads of house work done this morning and Katie was feeling loads better. The girls were as good as gold and then after lunch we wrapped up really warm and went for a bus ride into town. Where we got some wool to make decorations for Christmas, and some cat food.. exciting times... but we did find some maryland cookies on by one get on free so that was great! We went to the park and have a freezing, and beautiful time. It really was the most beautiful day here on portland. Even the bus drivers were nice and the other passengers helped me with my pushchair so it was lovely!

Then we had my friend Tegan over for tea and she brought her Niece and Nephew over to play with Charlotte and my other friend Roz turned up so we had a jolly tea party! They even tidied up before they went home! Charlotte was very very tired and a little bit of a monkey to put to bed, but only because she got herself sooo excited playing with Katie that she couldn't settle. But once in bed she was a good girl and slept well.

Rich had  a good day, he sounded possitive, hopeful and very happy. Not worried at all. He didn't sleep well last night as the bed was lumpy... but he said he still though he did a good job. We shall just have to wait and see.

Then I had a wonderful evening talking, laughing (a lot) and praying with Roz (who has only just left t go home and it's LATE) but we had a super time! I feel really blessed to have such good friends!

I am really nervous about the weekend! At the weekend I have to baby sit all my brothers and sisters (apart from one) and although I know they will be great and we'll have a good time I still feel a bit nervous... But they are good kids and I wot be alone.. so I will just hang on for the ride and we WILL have fun.. You hear.... hee hee..

Anyways it is LATE... and I've finished my Chocolate Ration (I think I should have a serious think about how much chocolate I am eating these days...) so I'm off to bed. Good night who ever you are reading my blog. I hope you sleep well and/or have a super day tomorrow. Even joy the snow if you have some. It wont last long!

xXx

He's Gone..

So Richard has gone off for his interview. He was really lucky and had  a good drive there. For anyone who is reading this a long while after it is written it is snowing al over the country at the moment and so he's really bless to have got there okay!

He has arrived and meet the rest of his 4 person team, they will be doing all the team tasks together, and it turns out that he already knows 2 of them and he gets on really well with them. If they all pass then he they will mostly likely all be training together and two of them are going for pilot and the other one for observer like Rich. So that is all very exciting! He sounds really happy and very carm on the phone. I am so please I was a little worried about him.

I AM NO LONGER SACRED ABOUT THE INTERVEIW! I have decided to leave it all in Gods hands, worrying about it wont help and I can't do anything from here anyways so I'm just Gonna leave it up to him. He knows best after all and we don't want to step out side of his plans for us, so no point in worrying! Okay so I might end up eating my words in e few days, but for now I am a tiny bit please with the fact that I cam let go. I never would have been able to do that a few weeks or even days ago!

Charlotte is missing her daddy and proudly announced to me (while sitting on the toilet) that she is going to be a helicopter Pilot and Daddy can sit next to her while she flys and mummy and Boo Boo (that is what she calles Katie) can sit in the back of her bright Pick Helicopter. I'm so excited my little baby has just had her when I grow up I'm gonna be... moment. She's not a baby any more!

Well the washing up needs doing and for anyone who knows me that is a very regular comment for me at this time of night, then a hot bath, with a good book and BED...

Oh yeah. Have a nice night ya'll, sleep well and we'll see how tomorrow goes.

One More Sleep...

One more sleep till the Big interview! Well at least until Richard leaves for the big interview. I'm really excited and also a little scared.. I'm not really sure why I am scared because I know he will pass if it is the right thing for us, but it's kinda a weird feeling I guess.

I had a little panic this morning because I suddenly realised that Richard had a LOT of work left to do today and I had not planned anything for us girls to do! But it didn't last too long as my lovely friend Ellie Kindly said she would come with my to the Fun Factory with the girls in the afternoon and the morning was mostly taken up decorating the cakes from yesterday and cleaning a cupboard. Both Girls went to bed really well tonight and although the pub is playing karaoke very loudly just a few houses down they seem to be staying asleep.

Richard has learnt all he needs to learn... we hope and we've iron, ironed again, folded and packed everything, we've polished those shoes, thought about the answers he might have to give during the main interview and even tied the ties, just in case he has a mad moment and forgets what he is doing!!! All that remains is to brush teeth, spend some time talking and praying and GO TO SLEEP!!!

Love you Richard. You are already my Hero! Go get them!

One full day left, and Katie's real birthday!

Not a huge amount to report today. A lot less stress around today. I think Rich's pretty much finished the studying he has to do, just has a little bit left for tomorrow and then the packing and a good night sleep... hopefully!

Today was a bit different and I made myself get up before everyone else. It was something I tried out last week and last week was a pretty great week. I don't know quite what it is that is different in the day but it seems that if I get up out of bed and go down stairs, have a quiet de-caf coffee and a bit of quiet time, some how the day is never so bad. No sure if it's just getting a head start on the day, feeling a little more awake when the kids get up or the quiet time, but it makes a huge difference. Yes I am more tired, but some how the tiredness doesn't seem so bad and even though Katie has been crying a lot of the day (poor kid has huge back teeth coming) it has been a good day.

I feel for Katie I really do, it was her first birthday today! And she felt soooo poorly. I know she doesn't really know what is going on, but we didn't do much as we had already have her early birthday when rich's family where down, and although we made cakes with the plan of decorating them and having a little teddy bears picnic.... the car died and so we couldn't get out to buy the Icing sugar I had run out of so they were a bit boring and we thought it would get fixed sooner so we kept on waiting and then it was just to late.. so most of the cakes have made it into a tin and will be eaten tomorrow with lots of pink icing and sprinkles.

Well we have a busy busy day ahead tomorrow and it is getting a little late now so I will have to run, but the whole getting up early making the day better is an interesting idea which must be thought though and experimented with!

Dare 2 Dream

Becky

2 days to go and the tension is mounting...

The stress is building and although it was a good day, the girls and I went to the park and then to bounce and play (a fun indoor play place for kids) There is a definate tension in the air and the time for the big interview draws near. Some days it is really easy to give it all to God and to not worry. To trust they we will be in the right place at the right time and that Life will work out. Other days my brain starts asking really annoying questions, like "What are you going to do if he doesn't get in?" "HOw will you ever get out of the mess you are in?" "How will Rich cope if he fails? How will you cope if he fails!!!!"

The truth is I just don't know, and worrying about it is not going to help things. It's going to make me grumpy, moody, sad and depressed. It wont help me sleep and it wont he Rich, in fact worrying is actually more like to to make him fail than to help him. So I need to let it go, and just support him.

It's a very tough job trying to be supporting, to know what to say at the right time and when to keep my mouth shut. To know how much to expect from him and to make allownses for the stress. To know it's the stress talking and not really him and to be a good wife. I know I can't do it in my own strength.

I didn't want to make this Blog all about God but the fact it that God is now a huge part of my life. I thought he was before but really he wasn't I could talk the talk but I certainly didn't walk the walk. I beieved in God but I didn't know him.

I don't think that God has made these bad things happen, but I know he has made it work for good. That though it I have become a stronger person and that by giving my worries to him I can then get on with the job at hand. So today I make a physical step of Casting my worries on him, because I know that he does care for me. I know that he knows the plans he has for us and that if I commit my ways to him and trust in him that he will act. That if I seek him first that he will take care of my every need and will walk with me every step of the way...

So I'm sorry if you are not hear to read about God, but it wouldn't be a true story of my life if I didn't talk about the people in my life and he is def in my life right now!

Trust in God with all your heart and lean not o your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and HE WILL DIRECT YOUR PATHS!

Third day Lucky!

Today has been a lovely day. We slept really well after Katie went back to sleep, and Charlotte didn't wake up in the morning till 7 so that was FAB!!!

Charlotte went to pre-school this morning, it's only her third day there and she really loves it! She cried so much when she had to go home.. lol I hope it's just that she was having fun, and not that she hates me. lols (I do know she doesn't hate me really) It was really great to see that she loved it so much. The first day she was fine when I left her, but really upset by the time I came to pick her up. However after we had been at home for an hour she wanted to go back, second day she was a bit more worried when I left her, but really happy when I can to pick her up and wanted to show me all the things she had been playing with. and today she was happy when I left her, and okay during the morning and only upset when the staff told her to say good bye to her friends! I feel much better now I know she likes it! Rather than just hoping she does.

Had to take Katie to the Doctors because she came out in spots all over her tummy and back, I thought it might have been Chicken Pox as one of her little friends has it, but I am informed that it is just a viral rash and nothing to be worried about. She's a bit grumpy as she is teething as well, but still smiley and very cuddly so can't complain. She really is a wonderful girl. Only two more days till her first birthday so that is exciting! I am so glad that God has given me two wonderful little gifts to take care of and I can only hope that I will do a good enough job.

The rest of the day was pretty good, and we all had a little movie evening, which was really good fun. We started watching Toy Story 3, but didn't get too far before little people were very sleepy and need their beds.

Poor Rich has been feeling pretty unwell the last few days. I think it's probably just stress and have sent him up for a hot bubble bath and bed. I hope he feels better in the morning. He is doing so well with his studying and working hard at it. I know he is worried because he wants to do a good job of this interview so he can take care of us. I hope he knows we love him no matter what and that we will support him no matter what. If you read this Rich then you have to know how much I love you and that I think you are a wonderful man, sorry for being grumpy sometimes. Thank you for putting up with me... lol I hope you feel better tomorrow and can kick butt with those jobs you have.

Well my back hurts from cuddling my lovely kids, my fingers are sore from cutting my lovely husband's hair before his interview, my feet hurt from running around all taking care of my beautiful family and home, but they are good aches. Aches that remind me how lucky I am to have a family who love me and who like to spend time with me. Who cares if they make a bit of mess I wouldn't swap them for the world!

So it's off to bed for me. I hope you sleep well and have a good day tomorrow... Lets just take one day at a time, and see where we get to. xx